Outside of plans to conceive, most people don’t focus too much on scheduling and planning sex. It occurs more spontaneously, and its frequency ebbs and flows based on myriad factors. Couples who are eager to get pregnant can sometimes get caught in the trap of turning sex into a chore. Here are some reasons you should avoid that trap and just enjoy the process.
The purpose of sex
Sex is a highly personal part of life that means different things to different people from different backgrounds and cultures. Most of us can agree pleasure and bonding are top reasons we have sex. Procreation is also an obvious one.
Scientists have studied the female orgasm for a long time, trying to discern its evolutionary benefits and effects. One hypothesis is that it influences natural selection, with females choosing mates who can bring them pleasure. If that sounds odd to you, psychologists at University College Cork in Ireland conducted an experiment on a small sample of volunteers to test the validity of this hypothesis [1]. It turned out that during orgasm, the female body does everything it can to speed up the delivery of sperm to the fallopian tubes. In contrast, when females are not engaged in enjoyable sex and do not reach orgasm, their likelihood of conception decreases. There is a lesson here for couples trying to conceive: prioritize pleasure.
Frequency for conception
The Mayo Clinic recommends that couples trying to conceive have sex every day or every other day [2]. In the few days before ovulation, it is recommended to have sex every day. For those trying to conceive via artificial insemination, the American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM) recommends that seminal fluid should be used for fertilization within three days [3].
Abstinence and sperm count
Some couples believe that abstaining from sex (specifically, from male ejaculation) during likely infertile days will increase the male partner’s seminal fluid volume and sperm count for the fertile days. According to studies [4], the volume of ejaculate does increase between the third and eighth day of abstinence. After the eighth day, however, there is no further increase. More importantly, though, the number of motile sperm in this larger volume of fluid is actually reduced. The fact is that those who have daily sex have the maximum concentration of sperm in their seminal fluid, and peak motility for sperm has been observed after one day of abstinence [4].
So, as the Mayo Clinic recommends, the optimal frequency of sex for conception is indeed every day or every other day!
