How to talk to the doctor during prenatal checks
During the first few weeks of pregnancy, a woman will not show at all, but she may have gained a bit of weight already because of an increase in her blood volume. Her body is starting to adapt to lower blood pressure, so she’ll likely feel less dizzy or weak soon [1], and she may start experiencing pulling pains in the lower abdomen due to increasing tension in the ligaments of the uterus [2].
It is in this context that the first prenatal visit happens, so both of you may have a lot of questions. Many men feel uneasy at an OB-GYN's office, but it may also be challenging for a woman. Some doctors can come off as cold or may not have the best bedside manners, making a woman feel vulnerable [3]. However, a couple of things can help ease your partner’s prenatal checkups.
Choose the doctor in advance. This is a huge decision, so ask friends for recommendations and read reviews. You will both feel a lot more comfortable if the doctor is polite and kind [3].
Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Everything and anything you don’t understand or have doubts about are legitimate questions. Doctors are obligated to explain everything they do during a checkup, why they prescribe any drugs, and the purpose behind any additional screenings they order. You should also ask about the possible side effects of any prescriptions and alternative treatment options. If the doctor refuses to answer your questions, this should be a red flag for you and your partner [4].
It is only natural for a pregnant woman, or for both future parents, to be nervous during prenatal visits, and it may be difficult to come up with questions during the consultation, so make sure to write them down beforehand. Speak up if you are uncomfortable with the doctor's attention, and remind your partner she can ask the doctor to stop if she feels uneasy at any point during the check-up and to express her objections confidently. You can even practice all of this before the appointment, especially if you won’t be able to accompany her [5].
